Wednesday, April 23, 2008

Holy Shit, A New Post!

Since it's been at least a week since my last post (I don't even want to look at the date), it must mean that it's time for the obligatory post to let people know that I am still alive and well, despite my advanced age and insane amount of travel the past two weeks. I've been derelict in my writing duties, with most of my otherwise free time lost to my new job which requires me to focus during the day time (as well as drive to every day). The carefree days of working from home and focusing more on my Wii bowling score than my personal grooming are a thing of the past, boys and girls. Goodbye midday grilled cheese sandwiches and work wardrobe consisting of shorts and t-shirts. Hello collared shirts and non-Nike shoe apparel. Oh well. On the plus side, they have a fully stocked fridge, ample caffeine and free working lunches twice a week.

So far, I *really* like my job. I won't say "love," because that special word is reserved for truly special things, like unicorns and Scarlett Johansson. But I think that I'm going to really enjoy working here. The people are very nice and professional, and extremely smart. To the point where I wonder if I am the dumbest person working for the company. I'm not insecure by nature, but I sometimes wonder how I lucked out and got this job. It's insanely better than my last job. I'm learning new things each day and am actually using my brain for the first time in years it seems. So far, so good.

[ Editor's note - for the eight people that regularly read this blog, please make sure to bookmark today's entry for future reference when David James posts his umpteenth comment about how crazy his company is and how longs for a new job. We're putting the over/under at 20 months. ]

Tuesday, April 15, 2008

More Travel Funnery



The more things change, the more things stay the same.

So after I posted yesterday, I hopped on a plane from Vienna (which for the life of me, I will always associate with Virginia rather than Austria) to Helsinki for the last leg of travel. After ingesting some sort of mystery sandwich, I quickly passed out to make up for my profound lack sleeplessness. After about 40 minutes of blissful napping, I was awakened by some sort of commotion in the plane. I awake sluggishly and look to my right to find that the woman sitting across the aisle from me is throwing up. Flight attendants are trying to help the bulimic woman as she empties her stomach, while passengers looked upon the situation with concern.

Was I concerned? No, unless by concern you mean "horrified and annoyed."

Hey honey, would it have killed you to get out of your seat and take care of your business in the bathroom, which was located DIRECTLY BEHIND your seat? Seriously, we're talking about 3 feet. It's not like someone asked you to land the fucking plane, simply exit your seat and scurry right behind you so we don't all have to see and smell the contents of your stomach?

Jesus Christ, why does this shit always happen to me?

Monday, April 14, 2008

The Birthday Man Cometh ....

It finally happened.

No, not death by travel-induced exhaustion.

I turned 40 today. I spent my traditional birthday weekend in New York with good friends. It was a great time, highlighted by my performing karaoke with a live band at 2:00 a.m. in a New York bar. Suffice it to say, it wasn't my best performance (in fact, I was terrible), but it was a lot of fun.

But that was this past weekend and today (Monday) is my actual birthday. So how did I celebrate my actual birthday? Well so far, I spent it on a plane sitting next to a very nice, elderly Austrian man on a flight from New York to Vienna (on my way back to Helsinki) watching "The Hitman" over and over, unable to fall asleep. Meanwhile, my new friend who looked at "Enchanted" more than once. I say "looked at" instead of "watched" because he never put on his headphones. He simply stared at the screen. Old people are funny like that.

I've been bracing myself for this day for a while. I'm not sure what I expected would happen -- would gray hair immediately sprout out of my head? Would liver spots appear overnight? Would I start to walk hunched over with a limp?

In actuality, I feel and look the same as I did yesterday. But it's somehow anti-climactic. My friends know that I hate being the center of attention, but for once I'd like to have some sort of party. I mean, I'm fucking 40 now. By all reasonable estimates, my life is half over. I secretly would really like a big dinner with friends on my actual birthday. Instead, today I'll soon be back in Helsinki, the land of the vowels. I'll probably have dinner with my new boss (who I really like a lot), who is also in town this week. It's not quite the birthday bash I dreamed of, but it's better than eating alone again in a restaurant filled with people named Teppo and Paivi.

I'm still wildly lucky to have great family and friends, so I'll stop my complaining and go back to trying to quench my endless thirst for caffeine. Who needs sleep when you can drink coffee instead?

Thursday, April 03, 2008

Dear Audience, It's Me Margaret

So if a blog in the forest isn't posted to, does it make a sound?

It's been a loooong time since I've posted and a bunch of stuff has happened over the past two weeks:

* I finally finished up at my old job.
* While I was on vacation in between jobs, I caught some sort of bird flu/SARS/Ebola virus, which totally laid me out. Its been a long time since I've been this sick, which is now on its 9th day. At times I doubted I would live to make it to 40 (which is right around the corner).
* I bought a new car and otherwise spent way too much money.
* I started my new job this past Tuesday, and so far, it's a vast improvement over the past job. Employees like their jobs, my boss is nice and normal, and the work is interesting. Throw in ample amounts of free caffeine and it's pretty idyllic. I'm sure I will soon loath the commute, but for now it's manageable.
* I head to Finland on Sunday for 2 weeks of meetings and training.
* In between those 2 weeks, I will fly back to New York for my annual birthday weekend. Drunklairity to ensue.

So that's basically it in a nutshell. I'm still getting acclimated at work, but I will actually have the time and health to post more frequently. Jesus, I've just got to believe there will be some decent content as a result of my 40+ hours of flying that's scheduled over the next two weeks. And it can't be any worse than the past two weeks.