Lunch With the Spears Family

Those of you that know me, know that I can be somewhat risk averse. For example, I've never gone sky diving or bungee jumping. I'm also not a huge gambler. (As an aside, I've never even been to Las Vegas, which people in California think is entirely insane).

Nevertheless, I would have taken everything that I own -- my house, my Prius, and my savings -- and wagered it all on the fact that Cheetos was one of the major staples of Britney Spears' family diet. Now I wouldn't be so bold as to try to predict which Cheeto type they regularly eat.

"I wonder, do they prefer original Cheetos or are they fans of the Flaming Cheetos?" (which are, as an aside, fucking awful)."

But there was no absolutely no doubt in my mind that she and her children were regular consumers of Cheetos.

And, thanks to "OK" magazine (what a dumb name), my firmly held beliefs were proven true. This photo is fantastic. You have to love the fact that the bag of Cheetos is prominently placed at the center of the table, just like a Thanksgiving turkey. She probably believes that Sunkist "orange drink" is the same as "fruit juice." The only thing which is even mildly surprising is that one of her handlers didn't have the common sense to at least make an effort to hide them off to the side.

Next proposition bet: will the Spears kids collectively weigh over or under 500 lbs when they youngest one turns 18. I'm taking the over. And yes, I am an asshole.