Arlen Specter, Thy Name is Asshole

When it comes to national affairs, there are important matters for Congress. Like getting the hell out of Iraq. Like balancing the budget and reducing our insane debt.

And then there are REALLY important matters for Congress.

Like maintaining the integrity of professional football.

This past Friday, Senator Arlen Specter called on the NFL to explain why it destroyed evidence from the New England Patriots about a cheating scandal involving the surreptitious taping of other teams.

Specter, the top Republican on the Senate Judiciary Committee, said the matter could put the league's antitrust exemption at risk. "Their antitrust exemption has been on my mind for a long time," he said in a Capitol Hill news conference Friday.

And while the CIA's destruction of interrogation tapes is a far more alarming and important issue, Specter instead chooses to focus on the NFL issue. "I do believe that it is a matter of importance. It's not going to displace the stimulus package or the Iraq war, but I think the integrity of football is very important, and I think the National Football League has a special duty to the American people -- and further the Congress -- because they have an antitrust exemption."

Give Specter credit for being able to distinguish between the impending national recession and the Iraq war and a sport. Well done, Arlen, for being able to differentiate between night and day.

Specter went on to overreach the relevance of Congressional involvement by saying, "I don't think you have to have a law broken to have a legitimate interest by the Congress on the integrity of the game. … What if there was something on the tapes we might want to be subpoenaed, for example? You can't destroy it. That would be obstruction of justice."

As noted previously, Specter evidently has a huge hard-on for getting into the shorts of the NFL. Sure, I would rather them waste time focusing on professional sports than, say, wasting billions of dollars "securing our borders" from the illegal immigrants. But, fuck, let's get our priorities straight here. Of course, if Specter is deluded enough to co-author the controversial and implausible Warren Commission report ("Single bullet, fuck yeah!"), then he's liable to believe that unicorns are ticketing his car. Who knows.