In the latest in his series of contemptuous pronouncements, religious broadcaster Pat Robertson says God told him storms and possibly a tsunami will hit America's coastline this year.Robertson has made the predictions at least four times in the past two weeks on his television show "The 700 Club." Robertson said the revelations about this year's weather came to him during his annual personal prayer retreat in January.
"If I heard the Lord right about 2006, the coasts of America will be lashed by storms," Robertson said May 8. On Wednesday, he added, "There well may be something as bad as a tsunami in the Pacific Northwest."
Robertson has come under intense criticism in recent months for suggesting that American agents should assassinate Venezuelan President Hugo Chavez and that Israeli Prime Minister Ariel Sharon's stroke was divine retribution for Israel's pullout from the Gaza Strip.
As JP pointed out, really the best part is the line: "If I heard the Lord right about 2006, the coasts of America will be lashed by storms."
Like "talking" to God is like listening to a college lecture or talking on a shitty cell phone. I can almost picture it:
Pat: "Lord, what are you saying to me?"
God: "WOIJDFP)DJFJLJ SDKJ(@"
Pat: "Come again, lord? Can you repeat that last part?"
God: "SDOI OAI OIW 1U3IF!!"
Pat: "Uhhh, okay. Just to clarify - did you say 'the coasts of America will be lashed by storms' or 'the throats of Americans will be slashed by worms?' I really want to get this right for my 700 Club audience, which demands 100% accuracy."
While I believe that God is as real as the Tooth Fairy and Easter Bunny, deep down I secretly hope there is a god on the off chance that he might suddenly be struck dead by lightening. I can only hope.
2 comments:
he's a prophet, which requires 100% accuracy.
Even the fundy people I know think he's nuts.
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